Right to Remain Silent

I’ve recently come to the realization that network television will probably never make a reality show centered round me.  Not because my life isn’t interesting enough and not because the people in my life aren’t colorful enough. No, no, there’s probably plenty of material for them to work with. The problem has to do with the simple, unavoidable fact that I have a bit of a potty mouth.  Some of you may have noticed. I’ve known this about myself for some time, but my Lord, the things that I’ve been seeing in the news lately has had me making a run for the crown in The Most F Bombs per Minute contest (the title is currently held by Christian Bale in case you were wondering).

Can any of you relate? You turn on the news to see what’s going on in the world and are bombarded by so much horrible, detestable, gut-wrenching shit that your brain basically malfunctions. When my brain malfunctions, I am only really able to do one of two things:

  • Become speechless OR
  • Curse up a storm! This is where the producers of my reality show would decide to pull the plug. If one of my rants were ever broadcast on NBC, every other word would be a BEEP Now that might be okay in normal situations. But here lately, there’d be so many that you wouldn’t even know who I was mad at or why.  I’d be speaking Morse Code rather than English.

I know you’re wondering about that first point I made. Me? Speechless? Well, you got me.  I’m not really “speechless” in the technical sense.  I just can’t get past the various forms of the word f**k (in all its glory) in order to make my point completely clearly here in print.  My mother reads this blog after all. And if I were to censor myself, it’d be like reading one of those classified government documents with 90% of the text highlighted black.

Anyway.  It’s gotten to the point where I’m avoiding the mainstream news like the plague, so I’ve only been subjected to what’s been showing up on my mobile alerts and newsfeed. Stupidly, I thought this would “help” my mood.  Yeah, right.  My mobile alerts and newsfeed are filled with animal advocacy issues. Not exactly a subject that helps rein in my tongue.

I swear (ha!), it’s a wonder I haven’t had a stroke yet over the stories I’ve come across. Throw in some personal issues that have had me seeing red lately and it’s been a downright free-for-all at my house.  I won’t even bore you with the personal issues right now. Long story short, I’m sure you’ve heard the old adage “so and so rears its ugly head.”  Yeah, well…them ugly heads, they’ve been a-rearing…’Nuff said.

So what gets me sounding like Joe Pesci in a Martin Scorsese movie? In a word – Bears.

Or rather, bears accidentally mixing with dumb, ignorant, attention-hungry humans. There was a story about some woman who ran into two young bears over the summer when she was on a walk in a State Park – where (gasp!) bears live, in case you didn’t know – and rather than back away like a normal person or follow any of the safety protocols that are posted in parks, she simply could not contain herself and just had to have her 15 minutes in the spotlight. So she whips out her cell phone and starts videotaping them. Well, lo and behold, just seeing the bears in nature wasn’t enough.  She then apparently started trying to get them closer to the camera by beckoning to them in baby talk. When one of the bears opened its mouth in an obvious attempt to take in her scent (as we’ve all seen animals do, hell my cat even does it), she decided to claim that it “almost bit her.” Almost bit her.  How does something almost bite you, I’d like to know!  It’s not like she fought it off and kept it from biting her.  In the video, this “almost bite” was the bear, smelling her leg with its mouth open.  Do you see the beginnings of my frustration?

Rather than keep the information of this encounter to herself, she showed the video – no, not to park rangers, but rather, to the media (therein lies the 15 minutes of fame), with the story that she was “afraid” and was just glad she got out alive. There were several times that the bears took refuge near a tree or into the woods to avoid the woman because they were clearly nervous and uncertain…did she take the opportunity to leave the area or yell to scare them farther away (since she was sooo afraid)?  No. She stuck around, even going so far as to put her water bottle down so she could videotape better.

What happens next? Two dead bears, that’s what. Because the park rangers, in their complete and utter brilliance, thought that was the right thing to do (despite a public outcry and petitions coming out the ears).  It should be noted that just one of the bears even approached her and most likely wouldn’t have if the woman had just had some common sense.  Did I mention they were very young animals? Just a year and a half old. Still babies really. Was the woman fined for interacting with or harassing wildlife (like you’re supposed to be) for acting as she did?  No. Of course not.

Okay…hang on…Breathe, Wendy. Breathe. I usually cannot get through this story without cursing profusely and typing is no exception.  I must say the poor bears were surrounded by idiots that day and they paid the a dear price for human stupidity.

23 thoughts on “Right to Remain Silent

  1. Breathe ok breathe I can get worked up about things like the Bears too. But as for the language tsk tsk reality tv is nothing but bleeps the whole show. So you would fit right in. I have always said my life is the stuff made for reality tv its stuff you can’t make up. The Park Rangers will come under a lot pressure for how they handled the situation especially when animal groups find out that the lady bothered the bears first.

    • The park rangers were inundated with calls from an outraged public when they announced what they were going to do and people sent in petitions as well but it didn’t help. I’m sure they got an earful afterwards too.

      Ha! Maybe we should pitch an idea to the networks for a show 😀

  2. We are always told that if we see bears to turn around and quietly move back from where we came (if they aren’t charging us). She put herself in danger and cost the bears their lives.

    • In our parks (in my state), they say to back away if they don’t notice you or aren’t causing you alarm. Then to look big and make noise if you feel threatened. These bears were immature, just babies really. Only a year and a half old. I’m sure you’ve seen the video. They were scared and uncertain. If she had followed protocol, they could have easily been scared away. Even if she had just kept walking, she would have simply left the area and everything would have been fine. But no, she didn’t even put down her phone to stop taping and she kept talking to them. It’s infuriating.

  3. I feel your pain and frustration – tonight’s not a particularly good night for me to be asked my opinion of the human race. Even if one goes out of one’s way to AVOID watching the news and NEVER reads the comments, it’s still hard to ignore just how freaking ignorant, disgusting, and full of hate many of us have become. I try to convince myself that it’s just a highly vocal and visible small minority that’s getting the press while decent folks get ignored, living out their “lives of quiet desperation.” Then you run into a few examples in your personal life and it just makes you want to start cursing, screaming, cursing, crying, cursing, and smacking folks upside the head. Which, of course, would get YOU locked up, while the inmates continue to run the asylum.

    I wish I had a better answer, or any answer at all. Tonight, I’ve got nothing. I’ll let you know if I get any bright ideas.

    • I’m sorry you’re night is not going well. I’ve had a few of those myself so I know just where you’re coming from. What I hope is that the news outlets thrive on despair and horror, and that the reason the tales of good deeds and good people are so few and far between is simply because they don’t earn the ratings the media outlets so badly crave. Maybe if uplifting stories started receiving the same kind of ratings, we would see them more often. Because if it’s true that evil is overtaking us at the rate we see it on the news, we are all most definitely screwed.

      As for your comments about the human race, I know just what you mean and I say quietly to myself “I hate people,” about a thousand times a day rather than say what I’d really like to say…which again, would only sound like morse code anyway. LOL

  4. That’s the problem: Those-in-charge ALWAYS stand behind and support all those overprivileged middle-class-holes unconditionally, no matter who does what or at whose expense it winds up being.
    And animals in general are simply “not as important as” your average everyday “respectable” citizenry (as a rule).

    • I agree with you that many, many people (and unfortunately a great many of those people are “in charge”) believe animals are unimportant and insignificant and simply do not treat them or respect them as they deserve. I see it every day. It’s an extremely sad and disheartening situation indeed.

      I just read that a Danish zoo is planning on publicly dissecting a one year old lion it killed earlier in the year. That’s horrific in itself — but what’s worse is the reason they killed the lion. It was “surplus.” They had too many. So they chose one of the young lions and killed it to keep the numbers down. Now, this is a ZOO. The animals are contained, they have control over them. Why are they not taking precautions to keep the breeding down? Why are they allowing their animals to breed in the first place if they know they have a surplus of a specific animal? It’s just negligent and irresponsible I think.

      I hate people sometimes.

  5. Excellent post Wendy 🙂 No wonder the expletives run riot when you see news or stories like the woman with the bears. That is one of the problems with mobile phones and social media etc, nearly everyone wants, and can now get, their 15 mins of fame. But as you said, those sorts of people never stop and think of the consequences of their actions. The park rangers weren’t much better, for not applying common sense to the situation, and telling the woman how irresponsible she’d been 😦

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