The Curious Case of the Cart in the Wild

We all know the old (new?) adage: without pics, it didn’t happen. But I swear, yesterday, there was one Target cart sitting on the corner in my mother’s neighborhood. It was odd, I’ll admit, and I wondered about its sudden appearance, and truly, its very existence in such an incongruous place. However, I will repeat, there was ONE cart.

Today, taking the same route to drop my dogs off at my mother’s aka their sometimes daycare aka their grandmother’s house, there was another cart! Right next to, and even touching, the Target cart. This one was grey and inconspicuous… maybe it’s in the witness protection program? But if so, here it was, breaking all the rules by being out in public and fraternizing with a ne’er-do-well from Target.

Or maybe, they were in the middle of a clandestine meeting.

“Hey, our toilet paper is on sale for $500 this week, just thought you should know so that you can adjust your pricing scale accordingly.” *looks around guiltily* “Just don’t tell them I was the one to spill the beans. They might send me for scrap.  I’ve got kids, you know!”

Or, maybe they’re just two fated lovers making a plan to elope, and they were waiting to catch the 4:50 bus.

Or, maybe this is how store carts are born in the wild… they utilize fission (ha! Bet you didn’t think I knew that word!) to regenerate and the new entities are grey until they grow into their color. Like Dalmatians grow into their spots and Flamingos grow into their lovely rosy pink hue (spoiler: it’s the Flamingo’s diet that causes their color!) Anyway, if this is a case of grocery cart reproduction, at this rate, there will be a whole fleet taking over the neighborhood next week.

I know, I know, how do you think up such wonderful ideas, Wendy? Well, to be quite honest, I think I might need some sleep.

Be Afraid… Be Very Afraid

I’ve been studying some self-enlightenment material lately – more on that later. But one thing I’ve noticed in all these books and articles is that many self-help gurus preach that “you attract what you fear.” Okay. Fair enough.

For the record, I’m afraid of Tom Hardy. Scared to death, I’m telling you. And money! Great big gobs of money. I’m simply terrified of money… terrified, I say! I shudder to think what would happen if I were suddenly flooded with overwhelming financial stability.

There. Now, we wait.